Happy Autism Awareness Month! Autism month is always a nice way for my family to reflect on Tucker’s Journey and look back on the year. I wasn’t sure what I really wanted to write about. I cry and laugh all fucking year long…we all do as parents. Even if you are not a parent, we... Continue Reading →
Maxipad
Maxi pad, Sanitary Napkin/Towel, Kotex, Menstural Pad "To help prevent scatter in your underwear." I wrote the company “Always” to congratulate them on a great maxi pad product, “fucking job well done”. Not only did I bleed for 30 days after a shitty miscarriage, but this pad was my floatation device for a whole month. I... Continue Reading →
Southwest
I fucking love Southwest Airlines "Customer Appreciation Day is Everyday" You fucking bet your ass it is! Last week, I was drinking some wine and thought…I am going to write Southwest Airlines and Maxipads. The wine was moving me. Recently I got back from a short trip from Arizona. I had a great experience with... Continue Reading →
Joel Osteen
Fucking Joel... My mom is a huge fucking fan of Joel Osteen and his hair. She watches him every Sunday morning. On Sundays, I have to call either before or after his program airs. Sometimes she will record his show. How is this my mom? This shit makes me laugh so hard… A few months ago,... Continue Reading →
Goose
I saw my old golf coach at Otto’s a little awhile ago. He didn’t care for me that much, only coached me a year or so. I said “hi” to him and small chatted for a bit, then went back to sit with my family. Then he randomly yells, “Hey, Christine! Remember when you killed... Continue Reading →
The Tee Shart
Golfing Celebration Never Felt So Good!!! My mom had a fun golfing group that would play late summer. It’s fucking random as shit, you have to be born in 1953 to be in the group. 2013 was a big milestone for the ladies, they are all turning 60. They decided to make a bigger deal... Continue Reading →
Autism Awareness Month
A lot of you know, I have three boys who ride my ass daily. I can’t believe how fucking different they are…looks, interests, and personalities. It’s like I had sex with three different men…(Chris, I swear it’s not the mailman, he looks like shit everyday…I wish he would tuck in his fucking shirt). There’s some funny... Continue Reading →
Glamour Shots
In the 80’s and early 90's there was a place called “Glamour Shots” in the mall. How this was a thing? I have no fucking idea. You all know what I am talking about…I’m in 5th Grade and my mom wanted me to give me this amazing experience where they dress you up like a... Continue Reading →
Muskrat
This is a code word that Chris and I stole from the movie, “Meet the Fockers”. Dina Burns would say “Muskrat” to Jack Burns if he’s being a dick to Gaylord Focker. “Muskrat Jack” says Dina. Then, Jack Burns would have to get his shit under control and mind his manners. Chris and I say... Continue Reading →
Flipper
My mom just told me my childhood dentist recently passed away. It brought back all sorts of crappy childhood memories for me. I hated that dentist and I was there all the time. My mouth is worth millions. Kid you not, that is how much money my parents have spent on my teeth and they... Continue Reading →